One thing I know for sure. If I had been Eve in the Garden of Eden I would not have been talking to a snake. You have to get close to one to see its face and have a conversation and "that ain't happenin'", as they say. But it happened today. I mean I got close enough to a snake to have a conversation! I saw his eyeballs while he was sticking his tongue out at me and shaking it like he was telling me off! He had his little tale in a wad and was shaking it at me too. I'm thinking, "Snake, get off of my property or you will be sorry! We are not about to have a conversation about it, Just go."
Needless to say he did not go. When I opened the front door to leave mother's house and return home there was this snake, all curled up with his triangular shaped head inside the storm door, trying to slither right on into the house. Well, let me tell you. If he had slithered into mother's home it would be one for the books. He would be sorry he ever considered it. She would have hit the alarm and her local fire and police would have been there before he could have said "hiss"! I know that because every now and then they show up. They are great alarm responders! I can vouch for them!
But he got me instead of mother. I decided it was probably a rattlesnake because it had diamonds on its back and I wasn't giving it the benefit of the doubt. Elaine, mother's angel from heaven, conspired with me for a moment after we finished screaming, and I chopped his head off with a shovel. It hurt my heart, but 'ya gotta do what ya gotta do'. I did it. I am woman, hear me roar.
So I guess the moral of this very true story is this. Do not show up at my front door if you are a snake. Especially on Halloween. I mean, "Really!!!" Do not even think about trying to get me to eat an apple. Pleeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaze! It is out of the question that I would even talk to you. Me, a person who would pick up a bug and take it outside rather than kill it, will chop your head off with a shovel, spill your blood on the sidewalk, and not think twice about it.