Focus on what you want, not on what you don't want. A great teacher told me that once.
I don't know about you but when things aren't going right I tend to think about that a lot. I go over all the possibilities, what could happen, what might have already happen, oh my gosh, what will we do! Have you ever been expecting someone to come home at night and they were late? Have you ever called the hospital to make sure they're not there or conjured up all sorts of scenarios about what could have happened?
Like waiting to hear back from a mammogram. You come home from work and finally there is a message from your doctor's office. The nurse says, "Your results are in. Please call the office at your earliest convenience." It's after 5:00 so you have to wait till tomorrow to call. "Well, if everything was okay she would have just said that", you say to yourself. "Why didn't she just say everything was alright? Something must be wrong. Oh no." Can't sleep all night thinking about it.
Your husband or teenager said he would be home by 9:00. Now it's 10:00. Where the heck is he? It's snowing outside and getting icy. Oh no, he's probably had an accident. Or he could be stranded somewhere. It would be awful if he ran out of gas in this weather. I know he was tired this morning. What if he gets sleepy and doesn't watch the road?
My boss looked at me funny. I know there are more layoffs coming tomorrow. What if it's me? I only have enough savings for 2 months and there are no jobs out there. Oh no! Susie will have to quit dance and we can't pay the mortgage. How will we do Christmas?
Makes me tired just thinking about it. There was a time when I thought like this...not all the time but on occasions when things weren't going according to plan. I focused my thoughts, unconciously, on what I did not want. Finally I learned about "focusing on what you want". Have you noticed that what you focus on expands? That you actually get more of that which occupies your thoughts? If you build something up in your mind you give it energy and it takes on a life of its own. Before you know it you have created a monster....Or you can create good.
Instead try focusing on what you want, not what you don't want. Even when it seems contrary to reality. See the best outcome. Think about good things happening. Expect good news from that medical test before you even go to have it. No matter when they call and what message they leave, expect only good results. If your husband is late, rather than expecting bad things to have happened, just hold the thought that all is well. Don't try to figure it out. If your boss looks at you funny, smile back. There could be lots of reasons he is looking at you. Assume the best. Maybe a raise? If you do get laid off, you will deal with it then, not before in the imaginary playground of your mind.
I'm not talking about going into denial. I'm just saying that when your mind takes off on its own in a direction that brings you pain or angst, rein it back in. Send it in a different direction. See the best, expect the best. What you focus on does expand so make sure your focus is where you want it to be.
All is well.